Wiggle.

There are caterpillars on the carpet
There are caterpillars on the carpet
And there’s a drone in my head
And the background noise goes
Tick tock tick tock hummm
And these blurred flowers got me screaming madness
Only my lips won’t open
You see the dangers of being sober
Are that one cannot expand the mind then freeze frame it
In so infinite a space in time
If that makes any sense; which it doesn’t
And there are caterpillars on the carpet by the dozens
And I’ve got these vines bringing me down intertwining and twisting round
Two lovers under the table blowing smoke in each other’s faces the way it happens in Alice in wonderland
And there is a stillness that is bliss
Pure peace ‘til someone’s voices calls to me
Lifts me up above and slowly I wiggle my frozen toes
And stir my rigid digits
You see I am everything here
But I am not me
And I rather prefer to keep it like this
Transcend, transcendence is it all utter nonsense?
I don’t know and I don’t wish to think anymore
Just caterpillars on the carpet and rose petals at the door
Got me floating seeing time like the volgons
A mountain range of simultaneous moments
Sweet memories that have me questioning what was I thinking
No, not that what was I thinking kind of retrospect
But that what was I actually thinking at that moment
You see, I weep for lost words
Mourn for their deaths because they will never return
And though I’ve only written one draft I’ve written hundreds and hundreds
And my heartstrings play like violins
Don’t weep I’m only being melodramatic
Seek solace in my solitude
Funny thing how humans equate this with the bathroom
Anyways there are caterpillars on the carpet
Caterpillars on the carpet and I am going back for tea.

untitled. short. story.

Words are just Words she said,
Words are just words.
Sticks and Stones he said,
sticks and stones.
Then why is it every inch hurts she said,
every single inch.
He stared.
She stared.
He cared.
She didn’t.
I hurt .
I know.
A lot.
I know.
How can you?
I just do.
She looked away.
He took a breath.
Help me she thought.
Help me he saw.
I could he said.
What she said?
I could.
She looked hard.
I could, help.
No she said and she let the tears come.
I could he said again, I know I could.
I don’t know she said, I just don’t know.
I do. I know one thing.
Only one she tried to joke but the words were muffled.
One thing he said again, so serious,
she had to turn away.
He took another breath,
one thing, I know, he said, is that I love you.
She turned so sharply she almost fell off the bed.
He exhaled and said I. Love. You.
And that’s the only thing I know. That’s the only thing I’m sure of. That’s the only thing that’s clear, that’s ever been clear for me.
She cried.
He watched.
She continued.
He moved closer.
I can’t take it he said.
Take what she said?
Seeing you in so much pain.
She cried harder.
I love you he said again.
She reached out her hand,
he took it in his, I can help you.
How?
Because I know what its like to feel unloved, to feel rejected, to feel like every inch hurts.
Words she said, Words there just words.
Words he said are just words unless you mean them.
She looked at him.
He looked at her.
Please she said, I need to know, your words, do you mean them?
Yes he said, with every inch of me, I mean them.
She shivered. Words she said.
Words he said.
And then he took her in his arms
And held her as close as he could.
She stopped crying.
He held her tighter.
She rested her head on his chest,
I love you he said.
I know she said.
I need you he said.
No she said, no. But you can have me.
He took his hand and turned her head to face him.
I will, he said, make every inch of you stop hurting.
Promise?
Promise.
He kissed her ever so softly,
They pulled away.
I’ll give them a chance.
Who a chance he said?
Words she said.
I’ll give them a second chance, because your words don’t hurt.
He kissed her tear-stained cheek, I love you.
I love you she said.

light at the end of the tunnel